THE DEMOCRATS’ LETTER OF APOLOGY TO CINDY SHEEHAN
5/30/07
Dear Cindy,
It was a real pleasure having you with us for a while. We are however very pleased that you have left the Democratic Party. As much as we are sorry for the hard feelings you expressed towards us in your letter of May,26 2007,published on the Daily Koz. We still hope that you will find peace in your heart.
So many wise Americans have warned you about our party. We are what we are and will never change. We are a major money machine that does what we are told to do by our corporate masters. Hey, that’s the way it is. That’s reality Cindy. We know that we used you . We know that we betrayed you, and all who stood with you. We know very well who and what we are. The American people haven’t a clue about their own political process. They all think that their vote counts and they elect us. They all think that they can make a difference in the political system. The truth is Cindy, which you have only recently found out is; that the Democrats and Republicans are one and the same. We have worked very hard to rig the system so third parties can’t cut into our action.
Please understand Cindy our ways are not against you. We don’t have anything personal against you. We treat everyone the same way. Look at Hillary and Obama they are happy to be used. Except for their complexion and sex they are one and the same candidates, good Democrats. Look at the entire smorgashborg of good Democratic primary candidates we have offered the stupid American public. It works every election. We make sure that there is a candidate for everyone, so all who are leaning right, left, and in the middle will think they have a choice; then we choose the worst candidate to run for president. Just like we did in 2004 with John Kerry. The Republicans do the same thing. It’s democracy at it’s best.
Everyone in the Democratic party expresses their thanks to you for the splendid work you have done giving life back to the Anti War Movement. Without you we could never have won the Congress back in 2006. Without you we would all be working as lobbyists. Most of us are working as lobbyists now, but we are far more effective as corporate and special interest policy makers / lobbyists. Ha, Ha.
Cindy, it hurts us to think you haven’t profited by all your work. We were very sorry to hear about your financial problems. We have been trying to organize a fund drive to help you, but all your once upon a peace movement buddies have all seemed to have deserted you. They all insist that we raise money for them. Now that your not supporting us anymore and have left the party all of our little lefties are crowding the trough. We have to admit that we profited greatly from your efforts, and we are sorry you never got to see any of the money. We’ve always seen you as our Cinderella. You know how that story goes. The difference is Cinderella is a fairy tale. Cindyrella isn’t.
Hey, come on, you of all people have got to understand what happens to liberal do gooders in this country. They get killed, or publicly destroyed. Who do you think owns the media in this country? Everyone knows the media is liberally biased. Everyone knows it’s controlled by socialists, CFR members and anti American globalists. No one in the Democratic Party ever takes the media too seriously. It was worth it for us to give you all the attention you received, until you turned against us. That’s not the way it works Cindy. You’ve heard Air America , Democracy Now and National Public Radio. Your suppose to kiss our feet. Your suppose to talk Democratic talk , your suppose to play the game. You didn’t want to play by our rules, and so now we don’t want you to play with us at all. We know our friends the Republicans won’t help you, nor would you consider working with them. You realize now that we are the only liberal team allowed to play in American politics. You either play with us, or you don’t play at all.
We want to tell to you something about all the liberal lefties, who call themselves Progressive Democrats. We think they are so funny. We laugh at them all the time. Who do you think pays them? Who do think funds their “Progressive” think tanks. We all laugh when L.A. Steel calls them” Oxymorons.” He’s right you know. There isn’t a progressive idea in the Democratic party, and we like it that way. Thinking progressively loses elections in the United States. Americans don’t like progressive thinkers. They call them radicals and communists. Look at Dennis Kucinich. We keep him around because he attracts all the old “Dead Heads” and “Hippies”and he gives us a slight edge over the Republicans, with young voters and burnouts.
We would like to offer our apologies, but really Cindy we aren’t sorry to see you go. Now that we are back in power we have to get rid of all of our detractors and critics inside the Party. That’s the way the game is played. We hope you don’t think for a minute,that anyone will support you now. We have received hundreds of thousands of letters and emails from our loving , Democratic, worshippers wishing us success. They are sending us more money than ever before. You understand what we are about. You said it most eloquently. It’s a good thing that most Americans can’t read very well and haven’t read your letter to us. Our No Child Left Behind Act,supported by the Great Democrat Ted Kennedy,and Great Republican G.W Bush, was designed to keep the next generation or two illiterate. Since we intend to keep going to war with everyone in the world, we need these kind of kids. Charley Rangel has been pushing for a draft for several years now . Now that he’s Chairman of the Ways and Means Committee we plan to bring up the bill in our next session. It’s a secret, but we want to reinstitute the draft next year, after we win the White House.
Hey, thanks for the ride Cindy. It’s been fun. We have to leave you now. Joe Lieberman is raising trouble for us in Iraq. He’ one of those “Attention Whores you wrote about, but he’s our Attention Whore. The guy who puts out the Democratic Underground is one of the best agents we have working for us. He’s a Democratic Whore. That’s what Democrats do. WHORES R US. John Kerry is one of our best. Bill has been pimping Hillary for years. We could never get you to play along with us Cindy, if we told you the truth so we had to lie to to you. It was good for business. There are hundreds of people eagar to replace you. We’re running auditions starting next week. Only Democratic Whores need apply. The Party has decided not to support or hire anyone as a leader in the peace movement, who has a conscience or really cares about ending war. It’s too near the elections to make that kind of mistake.
It’s time to end this letter now Cindy. We wish you well in your new endeavors, as long as you don’t get back into the peace business. It is a business Cindy, peace is a business just like war is a business. War is more profitable, but many of the “peace people” are making very good livings from all the donations and grants they receive. It’s the kind of business that organizers are paid to be in, and all the workers work for nothing. We know this because we fund most of them. You can’t be honest in this business Cindy, or you will go broke. All of our leading party members work hard and are paid very well to keep their Jons happy. We needed you Cindy to make us look good. You were our sacrifice. Sorry it had to be that way, but that’s the business. We didn’t mean to use you as much as we did, but you were so good for business we couldn’t let you go any sooner. To be honest, (which is something we don’t often do) we regret that you found out about us when you did. We could have used you for another year or so until the 2008 elections. We understand however, that everything runs it’s own course. It’s part of the business of politics. Have a great life Cindy and may God bless you.
Truly yours,
Howard Dean, et al
The Democratic National Committee, and The Democratic Party.
1 comment
Frenchy
July 29, 2012 at 1:52 am (UTC 0)
I’d venture that this article has saved me more time than any other.